Tandem Marriage

~ Tandem Marriage Blog ~

Please enjoy our blog where we have written some of our best advice, helpful tips, and things we ponder. These are all intended to help you have a better and more fulfilling marriage.

Please enjoy our blog where we have written some of our best advice, helpful tips, and things we ponder. These are all intended to help you have a better and more fulfilling marriage.

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Apologies, Forgiveness, Grace, and Love in Marriage

We get asked many many questions about how apologies, forgiveness, grace, love, and expectations should all work together. For example: Does every apology need forgiveness to bring closure? And, if so, how do you get your spouse to forgive after you apologize? And what about this one: Isn't grace and forgiveness really the same thing? To answer these questions well, let's go back to the beginning – the beginning of people. In Genesis 2:18, we see that God gave a woman to Adam to be a _partner_ or _companion_. The thought behind the Hebrew phrase "ezer kenegdo" means that God was giving Adam something that no animal or even God would provide…
READ MORE of the article above…
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​How Thinking the Best of Your Spouse Will Change You and Your World

Let's walk through a little example. Let's assume that your spouse had a misunderstanding with your mother-in-law—again. You assume the worst (maybe you truly believe you are being realistic) and you tell your spouse, "I can't believe you did this again!" Your spouse is trying to explain what actually happened, but you don't really want to listen. And since your mind is already made up about what happened, your not wanting to listen would make perfect sense. Your spouse feels disrespected and treated unjustly. Before you know it, your spouse starts talking louder as the discussion escalates…

READ MORE of the article above…
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Your Marriage Really Is What You Think It Is!

I recently read a great book by Dr. David Stoup called, "You Are What You Think." While this blog post is not intended to serve as a book review, the implication of Dr. Stoup's implications for marriage are just too good not to share! First, let's talk about brains. Helping people manage their brains is something I've done for years and something I am quite passionate about. I love teaching people how they can mold their brains in ways that allow them to have better lives and marriages. Others have referred to our brains as, "The Amazing Plastic Brain" because our brains are so moldable…

READ MORE of the article above…
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Selfishness: The Key to Ruining Your Marriage

Selfishness is the antithesis (the exact opposite) of how we should react when married. Let me say that one more time to let it sink in fully: selfishness is the antithesis of marriage. And, we all struggle with selfishness. You, me, your spouse, and my spouse all will struggle here. In case you were unable to grasp the full reality of the previous statement, let's break it down together. Selfishness is allowing your wants, your needs, and your preferences to come before those of your spouse or your marriage. I say allowing because unless you are intentional to live selflessly every day, selfishness will creep in and take over…


READ MORE of the article above…
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The Correct Way to Eat Humble Pie

Do you know that sinking feeling you get the very minute you realize that you messed up? That moment when you said something you regret and it's seconds too late to stop it from coming out of your mouth? That instant when you did something that you can't undo? That realization that you're going to have to eat some humble pie again We all do. This is the place where regret is born. You should never live with regret… especially if you don't have to. Regret could be summed up as that inner turmoil that threatens to consume every day of your life until you stare it down, size it up, and put it to rest once and for all…

READ MORE of the article above…
Comments

Show more AMAZING posts

Apologies, Forgiveness, Grace, and Love in Marriage

We get asked many many questions about how apologies, forgiveness, grace, love, and expectations should all work together. For example: Does every apology need forgiveness to bring closure? And, if so, how do you get your spouse to forgive after you apologize? And what about this one: Isn't grace and forgiveness really the same thing? To answer these questions well, let's go back to the beginning – the beginning of people. In Genesis 2:18, we see that God gave a woman to Adam to be a _partner_ or _companion_. The thought behind the Hebrew phrase "ezer kenegdo" means that God was giving Adam something that no animal or even God would provide…
READ MORE of the article above…
Comments

​How Thinking the Best of Your Spouse Will Change You and Your World

Let's walk through a little example. Let's assume that your spouse had a misunderstanding with your mother-in-law—again. You assume the worst (maybe you truly believe you are being realistic) and you tell your spouse, "I can't believe you did this again!" Your spouse is trying to explain what actually happened, but you don't really want to listen. And since your mind is already made up about what happened, your not wanting to listen would make perfect sense. Your spouse feels disrespected and treated unjustly. Before you know it, your spouse starts talking louder as the discussion escalates…

READ MORE of the article above…
Comments

Your Marriage Really Is What You Think It Is!

I recently read a great book by Dr. David Stoup called, "You Are What You Think." While this blog post is not intended to serve as a book review, the implication of Dr. Stoup's implications for marriage are just too good not to share! First, let's talk about brains. Helping people manage their brains is something I've done for years and something I am quite passionate about. I love teaching people how they can mold their brains in ways that allow them to have better lives and marriages. Others have referred to our brains as, "The Amazing Plastic Brain" because our brains are so moldable…

READ MORE of the article above…
Comments

Selfishness: The Key to Ruining Your Marriage

Selfishness is the antithesis (the exact opposite) of how we should react when married. Let me say that one more time to let it sink in fully: selfishness is the antithesis of marriage. And, we all struggle with selfishness. You, me, your spouse, and my spouse all will struggle here. In case you were unable to grasp the full reality of the previous statement, let's break it down together. Selfishness is allowing your wants, your needs, and your preferences to come before those of your spouse or your marriage. I say allowing because unless you are intentional to live selflessly every day, selfishness will creep in and take over…


READ MORE of the article above…
Comments

The Correct Way to Eat Humble Pie

Do you know that sinking feeling you get the very minute you realize that you messed up? That moment when you said something you regret and it's seconds too late to stop it from coming out of your mouth? That instant when you did something that you can't undo? That realization that you're going to have to eat some humble pie again We all do. This is the place where regret is born. You should never live with regret… especially if you don't have to. Regret could be summed up as that inner turmoil that threatens to consume every day of your life until you stare it down, size it up, and put it to rest once and for all…

READ MORE of the article above…
Comments

Show more AMAZING posts