Tandem Marriage Blog…

Please enjoy our blog where we give some of our best advice, helpful tips, and share the things we ponder. These articles are all intended to help you have a better and more fulfilling marriage.
PRO TIP: Read each article as a couple (about one per week) and discuss it together. 🔥


A Marriage Needs Fertile Soil To Grow. Does Yours Have It?
by Brad Miller

Does your marriage have fertile soil? What does it even mean when we say "fertile soil?" This is one of those phrases that is used so often, the true meaning gets watered down. The word fertile means; (of soil or land) producing or capable of producing abundant vegetation or crops. For our purposes in this conversation, fertile soil refers to the material or environment that we plant a seed, a tree, or a marriage into in hopes of producing an abundance of good things in this life…


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Yes, You CAN Have a Better Marriage in Just Seven Days
by Brad Miller

For years, people have asked us if there is an easy way to get a marriage back on track. We have always said, “There is no easy way to get a marriage back on track, you have to do the work.” When we say, “do the work,” that typically means reading and comprehending good marriage books, or making adjustments to your mindset and lifestyle, or it could mean working consistently with a good counselor. And even though we still believe that doing “the work” is a good recipe for marital success…

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Comparison Will Ruin Your Marriage, Learning This Skill Can Save It
by Brad Miller

Most of us have some measure of a love/hate relationship with social media. We LOVE to see what other people are doing with their lives; how they live, how they vacation, how they dress, and how they love. But we ultimately HATE how all of this access into the lives of others makes us feel about ourselves and our own lives. These inevitable comparisons of our lives to the lives of others leave us with an unrealistic expectation of ourselves and our own lives. In short, we feel like we can never live up to the  standards we perceive in the lives of others…

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Conversations That All Married Couples Should be Having
by Brad Miller

For anyone who has been married for even a short time, you already know that there are conversations the two of you should be having – but you're not. We all avoid these conversations, each of us for varied reasons. Why do we do this? Why do we not have the conversations that we know we should have? The reasons are many and maybe you can relate to a few of these examples:

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When You Look for Adventure Together, You Will Find It!
by Brad Miller

Most of you, just like Tami and I, are going stir-crazy trying to figure out ways to bring some adventure to your "stuck-at-home" life. We have been learning to be a bit more creative in an effort to continue pouring into our marriage while doing all we can to respect current conditions. With that in mind, we are so excited to tell you about our recent adventure! We recently heard some buzz about an up and coming boutique hotel called Cuyama Buckhorn…

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Vulnerability, Laughter, and Shared Interests
by Brad Miller

Allow me to set the stage for you. I (Brad) have always loved music. Sometimes it feels as if well-written song lyrics, and the music that delivers them, help me to better understand things about myself. For example, if I hear a well-written love song, I will often feel more in touch with my own feelings about love and relationships. This means that a good love song can help me process feelings of love and affection for Tami, my wife. Therefore, when I hear a good sappy love song that speaks to me deeply, I play it on repeat — sometimes for days or weeks…

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Is Your Marriage Normal?
by Brad Miller

At one time or another, most married couples will ask the question, “Is our marriage normal?” This is a difficult question to answer since it depends on your definition of normal. We would suggest that a better question to ask would be, “Is my marriage healthy?” So, what does healthy mean when we are talking about marriage? A healthy marriage is one where both spouses contribute to the marriage, love and appreciate each other as well as maintain good boundaries that would…

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  • PC: Enrico Carcasci on Unsplash.com

Selfless Love, Thriving Marriage, and a Bunch of Pillows
by Brad Miller

I thought about titling this article, The Marriage Lessons I Learned From 100 Pillows. Sound intriguing? Good, because it certainly is! Entering into marriage, each one of us has our own preferences,  peculiarities, likes, and dislikes. This means that those characteristics of yours and those of your spouse will most likely be different. Learning how to respond to those differences can make all the difference between being happy and being very…

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There is More Power in a Marriage Vow Than You Realize - PART 1
by Brad Miller

Lately, I have spent a fair amount of time really trying to parse out the reasons why marriage vows are so powerful. To be fair, the reasons could fill the entire chapter of a book, if not the whole book itself. Nonetheless, I am going to do my best to merely give some of the highlights here. Please keep in mind that while it is not my intent to talk down to those who are not married (or not yet!), it's difficult to understand some of the benefits of marriage without contrasting them to…

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Those Who Think They Will Never Fall Out of Love Are at the Greatest Risk of Doing So
by Brad Miller

Everyone wants to find true love and have it last forever. The ugly little truth is that things don't always work out this way—and we all know it. Couples often ask us about the best ways to stay connected. The very fact that so many ask this question implies that early on in most marriages, couples become aware that things seem to be changing—and they are indeed. Can a husband and wife learn what to expect with these changes and how to stay well-connected in spite of them? Yes, they can. We would love to share with you a simple framework to accomplish just that…

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