Tandem Marriage Blog…

Please enjoy our blog where we give some of our best advice, helpful tips, and share the things we ponder. These articles are all intended to help you have a better and more fulfilling marriage.
PRO TIP: Read each article as a couple (about one per week) and discuss it together. 🔥


There are Different Types of Marriages in America, Understanding the Difference Could Save Yours
by Brad Miller

Some writers might start this article by saying, “Christian marriage is under attack,” or “We need to continue fighting for marriage.” I am convinced that both of those ideas, while well-intended, do little to help marriages to be any better. I also believe that understanding what marriage is, specifically what marriage is to you, is the critical piece that has been missing for far too long. Every marriage should have a purpose, but few spouses take the time to think about…

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Your Guide to Knowing the Difference Between the Big Things and the Little Things in Marriage
by Brad Miller

Together, Tami and I work with many couples. At some point, the husbands and wives that we work with almost always trip over a certain communication stumbling block. Invariably, he will say that she makes a big deal out of nothing or she will say that he does. The reverse is true as well where one partner states that X, Y, and Z are never important enough (or big enough) to him/her. Do you see the problem? Can you relate?

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Yes, You CAN Have a Better Marriage in Just Seven Days
by Brad Miller

For years, people have asked us if there is an easy way to get a marriage back on track. We have always said, “There is no easy way to get a marriage back on track, you have to do the work.” When we say, “do the work,” that typically means reading and comprehending good marriage books, or making adjustments to your mindset and lifestyle, or it could mean working consistently with a good counselor. And even though we still believe that doing “the work” is a good recipe for marital success…

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How to Use All Five Senses to Be a Better Lover
by Brad Miller

If you listen to what the world tells you about physical intimacy in marriage, you will end up believing that it’s all about you getting your own needs met. The actual truth is, when you allow yourself to focus solely on your own needs during physical intimacy, you are missing out on the very best that physical intimacy has to offer you — you are sacrificing deep relational connection on the altar of personal gratification. This is where it starts to get very interesting because when you seek personal gratification, that’s all you get. But when you seek deep emotional connection, you gain so much more…

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Comparison Will Ruin Your Marriage, Learning This Skill Can Save It
by Brad Miller

Most of us have some measure of a love/hate relationship with social media. We LOVE to see what other people are doing with their lives; how they live, how they vacation, how they dress, and how they love. But we ultimately HATE how all of this access into the lives of others makes us feel about ourselves and our own lives. These inevitable comparisons of our lives to the lives of others leave us with an unrealistic expectation of ourselves and our own lives. In short, we feel like we can never live up to the  standards we perceive in the lives of others…

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Conversations That All Married Couples Should be Having
by Brad Miller

For anyone who has been married for even a short time, you already know that there are conversations the two of you should be having – but you're not. We all avoid these conversations, each of us for varied reasons. Why do we do this? Why do we not have the conversations that we know we should have? The reasons are many and maybe you can relate to a few of these examples:

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Vulnerability, Laughter, and Shared Interests
by Brad Miller

Allow me to set the stage for you. I (Brad) have always loved music. Sometimes it feels as if well-written song lyrics, and the music that delivers them, help me to better understand things about myself. For example, if I hear a well-written love song, I will often feel more in touch with my own feelings about love and relationships. This means that a good love song can help me process feelings of love and affection for Tami, my wife. Therefore, when I hear a good sappy love song that speaks to me deeply, I play it on repeat — sometimes for days or weeks…

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What Started Out as a Date Night, Ended in a Lesson About Infidelity
by Brad Miller

Tami and I tried out a new restaurant the other night. In all honesty, the food was just ok. And since we are being honest, let me tell you what was going on at the table next to ours. Right next to us was a smartly-dressed forty-something couple having a glass wine and some appetizers. When we first sat down, I assumed this was a husband and wife enjoying a date night out on the town, sans kiddos. Since Tami and I just sat down, we were busy trying to get ourselves situated. We were looking at the menu to see…

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There is More Power in a Marriage Vow Than You Realize - PART 2
by Brad Miller

What you and I choose to believe about marriage is wrapped up in how we view The Vow. When I say, “The Vow,” I am referring to the holy (set apart for a purpose) and sacred (connected to God) commitment that was made (or will be made) on your wedding day. This is a promise, a covenant, and a pledge between a husband and a wife and the God who breathed life into them. How you respond to the promise you made will determine who you are – whether you…

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There is More Power in a Marriage Vow Than You Realize - PART 1
by Brad Miller

Lately, I have spent a fair amount of time really trying to parse out the reasons why marriage vows are so powerful. To be fair, the reasons could fill the entire chapter of a book, if not the whole book itself. Nonetheless, I am going to do my best to merely give some of the highlights here. Please keep in mind that while it is not my intent to talk down to those who are not married (or not yet!), it's difficult to understand some of the benefits of marriage without contrasting them to…

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