Welcome to the Tandem Marriage Blog…

If you aren't sure where to start reading on our blog, check out our START page here which lists some of our most popular articles as well as some of our most popular resources. Otherwise, please enjoy our blog, where we give some of our best advice and helpful tips and share all the marriage things we are thinking about. These articles are all intended to help you have a better and more fulfilling marriage.

PRO TIP: Read each article as a couple (about one per week) and use the article as a discussion starter between the two of you.

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Do You Feel Like You Have Tried To Improve Some Things In Your Marriage, Yet You Still Feel Stuck?
by Brad Miller

You may be one of the couples, who after working through a handful of issues still feels stuck. We want you to know, while there may be some complexities in your marriage that have not been addressed yet, you don't have to remain stuck. In these instances, Tami and I often recognized about 10 or so different unhealthy patterns that are all converging to make it feel like you are both STUCK in a rut. This is both good news and bad news. Let me explain. The good news is…

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You Will Struggle in Your Marriage at Times
by Brad Miller

I always say that "every marriage has issues, some couples deal with those issues." The implication here is that, as a married couple, you will either deal with your issues or refuse to. There are only two choices here, you either have issues and deal with them or you have issues and ignore them. So, which kind of married couple are you? Furthermore, any individual problem that causes tension or an issue in a marriage, is a marriage problem. It is not his issue or her issue, not my issue or their issue. IT IS A…


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You Think You Know How Healthy Intimacy in Marriage Works, But You Probably Don’t
by Brad Miller

If we talk about "healthy intimacy" in marriage, we must be talking about having sex as often as a husband or a wife would like to, right? Nope! This thinking is dead wrong and will eventually undermine and can even ruin your marriage. It really can! Not to worry though because we would love to help you with a healthier view of intimacy, one that will keep your marriage happy and thriving for many years to come, instead of merely the next 15 minutes. To help us figure this out, let’s look to both science and the Bible because they both have much to say on the subject…

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Why We Wrote a Marriage Book That Everyone Needs but Nobody Wants
by Brad Miller

There is a great deal of solid information and teaching out there from some expert marketers on how to market products and services to people just like you. These experts in the field of marketing say that marketers (this includes us since we have books/products to sell) need to survey their potential market to find out where their customers are in life (not location), what they want, and to learn the language they use. Once that information is gathered, a good marketer can create a product specifically targeted to a group that…

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Most Couples Think They Struggle With Communication at Times – Most of Them are Wrong.
by Brad Miller

Tami and I operate a group counseling practice in Southern California. We are known throughout the area for providing the best and most practical marriage counseling around. We love this reputation. With fifteen licensed counselors and associates on our staff, we collectively see about 150 clients each and every week. All of this gives us some incredible insight into the kinds of things that most couples struggle with. Further, we know what it takes to get these couples back on track when needed…

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What They Can Never Take Away From Us
by Brad Miller

What felt like the end of the world for us, was an opportunity for deeper connection in our marriage. I’m so glad we didn’t miss this opportunity. Here’s what happened. Tami and I fell in love at 17 and 18 years old, respectively. What a wonderful, fun time this was in our lives. Once we started dating, we enjoyed four foundational years of romance and were married by the time we were 21 and 22. We both came from humble backgrounds — so, in our new married life together, we had nothing except each other…

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How to Break Your Spouse’s Heart the Right Way - And Why Building Trust Matters
by Brad Miller

If you are married, sooner or later you will have to deliver some difficult or heartbreaking news to your spouse. Maybe you got the phone call about your spouse’s dad being in a car accident and you don't want to tell him/her. Or maybe it was your spouse letting you know he/she did not get the job they’ve been working so hard to get. Maybe there is something bigger that you know you need to get off of your chest—something that is sure to be a…

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Your Wedding Anniversary is a Bigger Deal Than You Think
by Brad Miller

Thirty-two years ago I took Tamara Ann Schroer to be my wife. Everything in my life changed that day, but not in the "rainbows and sunshine" kind of way like you might expect. Tami and I made many promises to God and each other that day, but the truth is that we really had no idea how much of a BIG DEAL those promises were — until now. On the day we married (April 20th, 1985), I knew that being with Tami made me very happy and I wanted…

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You and Your Spouse Have Differences and the Problem Is Not What You Think It Is
by Brad Miller

If you have been married for any time at all, you have become keenly aware of the differences between you and your spouse. I am talking about the kind of differences that drive you both bonkers. For example, maybe one of you makes decisions quickly and decisively and the other makes them slowly and methodically. This kind of thing drives you both crazy. Or, maybe one of you gets your feelings hurt easily and the other never seems to…

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Don’t Make the Mistake of Thinking Your Marriage Can Survive Without Mentors
by Brad Miller

When it comes to having a happy and thriving marriage, most of us think it’s pretty straightforward. You fall in love with each other. You decide you want to spend the rest of your lives together. You vow to love each other in front of your friends, your family, and God. Then you merely enjoy the ride from there, right? We all wish it were this simple…


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