Most of you, just like Tami and I, have been going stir-crazy trying to figure out ways to bring some adventure to your "stuck-at-home" life. We have been learning to be a bit more creative in an effort to continue pouring into our marriage while doing all we can to respect current conditions. With that in mind, we are so excited to tell you about our recent adventure in hopes that it will inspire your future adventures!

We recently heard some buzz about an up and coming boutique hotel called Cuyama Buckhorn ( We knew it was out in the sticks in a town called New Cuyama (pronounced /kwiːˈjɑːmə/ from Chumash: Kuyam, meaning "To Rest, To Wait) which met our current needs in several ways. First, this would likely mean the hotel would be quiet and peaceful–just what we needed. Check that box. This also meant that there likely would not be hundreds of people flocking to this place who are not the least bit concerned about “social distancing.” Check again. It meant there would be lots of open spaces for hiking, driving, and just breathing. Check. Lastly, we were hoping to find a place with just the right level of service. We didn’t want staff standing around waiting for us to snap our little fingers each time we needed something, instead we wanted more privacy than that. How do we find the right kind of service? Talking to the staff on the phone certainly made us feel that the level of service at this boutique hotel was exactly what we needed. Therefore, since we had never heard of a town called Cuyama before, much less known anyone who has been there, we knew that we needed access to food, a nice clean room, good service, and people with a good knowledge of the surrounding area so we knew where to go and what to look for. Final check, Cuyama Buckhorn had everything we were looking for!

About — Cuyama Buckhorn

Our first conversation with the staff, the GM in our case, was both pleasant and reassuring. Keith assured us that “the Buckhorn” could provide exactly what we were looking for. (Photo credit above: This place has been masterfully restored.

Even though the restaurant was not open for seating during our visit, the food from this restaurant was available for room service. And the food was amazing! Our favorites were the ginger walnut chicken salad sandwich with a farrow salad and pork street tacos. (Photo credit above: We were also able to order coffee each morning and have it delivered to our room. 


These two Adirondack chairs are where we spent a good deal of time. Our food and drinks were delivered right to us. (Photo credit above and below: Tami)

After a hearty and tasty lunch, we were off for our first outing.

We took a drive to see the area around where we were staying and marveled at the peacefulness of everything we saw. When looking at the picture above, just imagine how beautiful and crisp the sky was in person. There was a cool breeze that followed us everywhere we went and brought movement and life to each of these scenes. It was so peaceful.

I have driven over many cattle guards in my life, but I rarely get the chance to see one of these massive and docile beasts up close. Time stood still as we, the cow and I, checked each other out for the longest time. Tami and I also had quite a conversation with the cow, but the cow will likely deny it. Haha!

The sunsets in the Cuyama Valley are simply gorgeous! We asked the hotel staff for the best place in the area to enjoy a sunset. Following the recommendation of hotel staff, we drove up Aliso Road until we found just the right spot. We turned our car around, opened up the hatch and took a seat to enjoy one of the best sunsets we have ever seen!

Then we drove back to Cuyama Buckhorn for the magical and peaceful nightlife there as well as s'mores by the campfire. All the fixins for s'mores were provided for us. What a fun treat!

Our last day was spent, you guessed it, relaxing again in the common grassy area between some of the hotel's twenty-one rooms. The temperature was perfect and this kind of relaxation was simply too good to pass up. As we lay together on the grass, we talked about hopes and dreams for our future, we talked about our families and how they have influenced us, and we talked about what it takes to stay in love. And this, friends, is how to stay in love—by talking about it and emotionally connecting with that one special person. This is how to foster love and connection in a marriage that will last a lifetime. Lastly, this is how to have a really great time doing it! 

Tami and I always say that one of our strengths as a couple is that we can make an adventure out of anything. During a time when most couples found themselves stuck at home and arguing more than usual, we decided to look for adventure. We found it in a place we have never heard of before. Would we go back? We are already talking about our next trip to this beautiful and peaceful place. ☺️


1. When was the last time the two of you stretched out of your comfort zone to find your kind of adventure?

2. In your opinion, do you and your spouse get away too much or too little? Why do you feel this way?

3. What could be three possible benefits to your marriage the next time you get away together?


We love giving you ways to connect as a couple. If you have any comments or questions about this post, we would love to hear from you using our contact page here.

By Brad & Tami Miller. Contact us at Copyright © 2020

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