Tami and I have been to several weddings in the last few weeks. This has us thinking a lot about how each of us is impacted by attending a wedding. Generally speaking, there are two ways that people think about a wedding they have been invited to.
First, some people have a hard time getting "into it" because they have so much on their plates. They see this wedding, and all of the details surround it (buying gifts, wrapping gifts, attending bachelor/bachelorette parties, getting your suit/dress cleaned, etc.) as overwhelming. And they have a right to since most people simply have too many demands placed on them already.
The second group of people are somehow able to unplug from all of those demands and savor every moment of a wedding. Just like any great movie that steals your attention and takes you to another place for several hours, the people in this second group are able to get caught up in the wedding ceremony and the celebration that follows. They are able to get swept away for a time. This, fortunately, is where Tami and I fit in most of the time.
Our sweet friends, Alex and Dusty, were married a few weeks ago. They have had a storybook romance, not because they are perfect or privileged, but because they are the kind of people who choose to see every moment together as a gift. You can readily see it in how they look at each other and in the way one lights up when the other enters the room. Their love for each other and their servant's heart toward one another is what many of us would call, "the real deal."
Since I am an ordained pastor, Alex and Dusty asked me to officiate their wedding. While doing so, I had the distinct privilege of a better-than-front-row-seat at their wedding ceremony. I was able to see the emotion on each of their faces as they saw each other during that first moment. I witnessed the sincerity in their eyes as they said their heartfelt wedding vows to one another. I felt the awe and wonder as they embraced the awesome magnitude of the commitment they were each making to share their entire lives with one another. It was truly amazing.
As soon as the ceremony was over, I was able to rejoin Tami and to start sharing some of these insights. Even though Tami's seat was not as good as mine, she saw and felt all of the same things I did. We talked about how young love is so sweet and unadulterated. We were able to spend some time reminiscing about our own wedding ceremony over 30 years ago. We pondered the ways in which mature love (where we currently are) is better in some ways but can be lacking in others. And we thought about what we need to do to incorporate more "young love" into our own marriage. Alex and Dusty's wedding was a great trip down memory lane and a great conversation starter for us.
So, how can going to a wedding strengthen our marriage and yours too? This can happen when we become intentional enough to slow down and ask some questions that may require some time and effort on each of our parts. Here are a few ideas to get you going. Discuss these questions with your significant other and watch the connection between you happen.
- What are the great hallmarks of young love?
- What are some of the benefits of more mature (seasoned) love?
- Can you name several aspects of young love that you need to renew in your own marriage?
- What will it take to incorporate some young love into your own love story once again?
Let this be a challenge for you to look forward to the next wedding you are invited to. Attend that wedding looking for the beauty in young love. Come up with some of your own questions or observations about marriage. Be intentional to start some conversations with your spouse about marriage, about young love, and about the two of you. You won't be sorry.
And here is Mr. And Mrs. Alexander and Dusty Provonsha!
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By Brad & Tami Miller. Contact us at brad@TandemMarriage.com. Copyright © 2016